my room's a mess. and my head is pretty messed up too. see, i don't know how i feel about everything so i broke up with you. i didn't feel myself that important to you, when you said you don't have any time for me - so i figured out something fastly, decided to let us be. now i'm confused and don't know what to say, to get you back, even for one night. i slowly realise, that i really didn't want to do that, i just wanted to hold on tight. honestly, you're the one who brought me back to life. i was deep down in hell until you came in to my life. you learned me how to love again, set my emoitons on fire. i didn't feel so low anymore, you really took me higher. what we had wasn't perfect, but what you gave to me was the most beautiful i could get. i was too closed, didn't show how much you really meant for me, but i never regret the first time we met. i made it unperfect, and i'm so sorry. but you should know, my feelings for you are still strong, so don't you worry. i'm having a tough time dealing with what i did to you, and thoughts about holding you in my arms doesn't make that easier. i just wish that i'd never had fallen inlove with you, or that i just could have stop this earlier. it feels so bad right now, feels like i never will get over you. it feels like you're stuck on my mind for a long timg from now on, and i think that's true. i know you probably hate me right now, or you just want to forget me. but i understand you. i don't know what to do, i want one more night to be with you. i wan't to show you how much you mean to me, but i don't know how. i guess i just have to figure that out. honey, i love you. i really do. if i wouldn't, i wouldn't have cried for you tonight. i wouldn't have cried for the stupid decisions i've made. i'm so angry at me. but i will try. one last time. to be with you. i will try. because i love you.